April 2010
Ryan Just Buzzed His Hair.
to a 3.
i don’t know if you know, but that’s really, really short.
and i’m depressed. :(
So, The Doctor Today Kind Of Sucked.
because my birth control shot isn’t working (as in it’s not stopping my periods, do not worry, i am NOT pregnant), it means that i could possibly have a non-cancerous tumor on my uterus. so in a couple of weeks i have a sonogram. and i got bloodwork done today just go check up on whatever they want to check. i have no idea what the bloodwork was for. but i’m worried about the...
I Needed Today With You.
alone in your room, curled up in bed, completely perfect. i just pray to god we can keep this up. lets have a good week. no more anxiety attacks. no more stuffed away feelings. no more hurt. please. i need you. i’ve said it a hundred times. my heart can’t handle anymore. my heart needed a good day like this, but my heart can’t handle another bad week. we’ve had so many good...
We Were Supposed.
to go to downtown dallas today. :( but we’re going next sunday for our nine month instead, because we’ll have more time. and i want to see the holocaust museum. it’s only $4. not too bad. but i’m just really really excited. we went camping this weekend, and i’m not going to lie. it was horrible. barely any sleep. so i’m going to ryan’s house, and...
I Feel Like I'm Upside Down.
and inside out.
like i need to become a completely different me, to be happy. because whatever i’m doing now, obviously isn’t working. and i need to figure it out. it hurts, but it’s kind of a relief to realize that i can do this. i know i’m not making any sense, or maybe i am, because you’ve been here, too. i’m just so messed up right now, and i need to turn...
Orange Gatorade.
tastes exactly like a melted popsicle. and it’s really gross. but i have to drink it, because it’s good for me. bleh. it’s so yucky!
I Won't Ever Let You Go.
and i won’t ever give up on you. please, realize that i need you more than i need anyone else right now. i need you to help me. my heart literally needs you.
My Heart Hurts. Again.
3rd anxiety attack since last friday. i’m not going to school tomorrow. i obviously didn’t get my reading done for my test. i’m sick of school. i’m sick of attacks. i’m sick of everything. i don’t know what to do. i keep saying that. again and again and again.
i’m really, really upset, you guys. it hurts. everything just hurts. inside and out.
So, This Treatment.
will get rid of my syndrome, but it is the craziest workout. just one lap down the pool got my poor heartrate up to 177bpm. while ryan was just swimmin’ away. it was hard. really hard. so i’ll keep working. i’ve been doing good, but i’m only on my second week. and it’s three months long. what’s cool is it’ll end around 4th of july. so that’s a good...
Restart.
Right now.
Nothing's Wrong With Us.
a lot is wrong with me, and i’m sorry. i let a lot out on you, and i probably stress you out really bad. i expect a lot from you, but all i need is love. i just need you to love and care for me, and i know you do. so i need to just shut up, and stop being such a stupid girl. i’m sorry. i’m going to stop. i’m trying to control my anxiety when it comes to you. you don’t...
“It isn’t the world at stake, Ender. Just us. Just humankind. As far as the rest...”
– Graff (Ender’s Game) (via laurenbabbles)
i love, love, love that book. (:
“Some people change and some just won’t, you can’t take back the words you wish...”
– MY FAVORITE HIGHWAY (via rudie)
i wish more people knew of these guys…
Two Anxiety Attacks In Two Days.
i don’t even know where to start…
i hate life. i’m depressed. but i wouldn’t choose to kill myself if i had the choice. i’ll live as long as i can to help the people i care for, and love.
i love the small things in life. the music. the travels. the little things that make it worth it. like those goofy pictures you just took with your bestfriend, or your boyfriend....
I NOW HAVE A TICKET FOR IMOGEN HEAP'S CONCERT IN...
I Wanna Crawl In Bed With You.
maybe love you a little bit, then easily fall asleep with you. we don’t even have to be touching. just knowing you’re right there next to me. knowing that inside, you love me with everything you have. and when the sun rises, you’ll love me just a little bit more.
that’s all i want right now. it’s simple. really. i can’t wait to marry you…
I Took Some Rad Photos Yesterday!
i’m editing some, here pretty quick. i’ll throw one or two up for ya. (:
Ft. Worth Arts Festival!
it was pretty much, incredible. i saw los lonely boys, and they were incredible. i’ve really gained a new appreciation for ft worth. i just love texas. it’s home. i don’t see how people hate it here. walking through downtown was too cool. the musicians scattered all through the streets. everyone’s art, everywhere. it was so cool.
basically, i had the greatest time. (:
Me & My Baby.
will be standin’ front row to jack johnson in august.
THAT, my friends, is true love.
(;
...Oh, My.
ticketmaster is the worst thing i’ve ever used in my life.
1 MORE MINUTE!!!!!!
I've Never.
sat online and waited for ten o clock to arrive to buy concert tickets.
i gotta tell ya… this feelin is killin me! I JUST LOVE IT!
4 MORE MINUTES.
Hello, What A Wonderful Life.
I’m making it a point to never ever leave your side You made me change The way I see everyday, everynight I’m tangled up in love I’m lost inside your eyes
And they say it’s never easy It’s a game that never lies But every time you’re with me I swear I still get the butterflies You light up every single Part of my life And I’m not going to lie I was a...
I Want To Write Songs
that are so real, but so real is almost so fake, which means that i should really write movies.
Nevermind.
I’ve found new music.
that’s all i need.
I've Got It.
i’ll just reblog for a bit.
that way i won’t sound so upset. let’s hear it for some smiles. bleeeeeh.
JFDSLJFdslFJDS.
screw today.
i just hate you. that’s all there is to it. :(
i’ve completely lost my head.
Insomniac, I am.
i said, ‘who is that lovely person?’ you gooofball. you read it wrong! and why is it a secret?
maryjaygee:
jessikuhalice:
i am so confused. pho is your lovely friend person? who is your lovely frienddddd?
maryjaygee:
jessikuhalice:
oooh, who is that lovely person!?
maryjaygee:
I can’t ever sleep early!!
GAHHHHH.
Well at least I get to talk to this here lovely person...
Insomniac, I am.
i am so confused. pho is your lovely friend person? who is your lovely frienddddd?
maryjaygee:
jessikuhalice:
oooh, who is that lovely person!?
maryjaygee:
I can’t ever sleep early!!
GAHHHHH.
Well at least I get to talk to this here lovely person until I so fall asleep.
:)
Sure! why not my pho-nomenal friend:) Aha, pho. :)
"I Can't Sing.
i can’t think. i can’t do anything. because you drive me so insane. i hate you so much, and i think that’s what makes me, what makes me love you so much.”
goodness. i feel horrible. i have a bad feeling. i shouldn’t have it. but i do. :/
Insomniac, I am.
oooh, who is that lovely person!?
maryjaygee:
I can’t ever sleep early!!
GAHHHHH.
Well at least I get to talk to this here lovely person until I so fall asleep.
:)
What In The World?
is wrong with this world!?
so many people have been saying horrible things about both alice in wonderland and where the wild things are. well, this past week i saw both. both are fantastic movies. i don’t understand why people are so dang closed minded sometimes.
goodness, you.
